The Dead Rabbit: The First and the Last

Image: Some artwork by Lord Jules of Hadder and his friends on the day that changed his life.

Good morning. It’s the last Friday of march. The first and the last... well not really. I’ll explain. Todays message will be very deep, I’ll warn you now in case you’re not in the mood.

This week I finished the last track for the record. It’s called “The Ballad of the Dead Rabbit”. Took a while but I suppose that’s life sometimes. Might be a little fix during the week but I think this version is good enough to post. It was the first track I started back before the fires, at least a portion of it anyway. Some vocals were actually tracked then in that home that’s gone now… and some vocals were done yesterday. It’s a little eerie in that way. It’s a very fitting end to this part of my life. A beautiful capsule of grief, loss survival, hope, determination, and despair all bottled up now in a song. I lost some friends along the way and even lost myself a bit.

Somewhere in the middle of this track is the record I made. Every other song was written about things and moments that fell in between the writing of this song. They each have a tale to tell during that time. So, you could say it all started here with the Ballad of the Dead Rabbit. These are the words and the story of why there’s a thing called Diamonds Hadder.

Someone once asked me, what is Diamonds Hadder. Maybe I didn’t even fully know, until now. Now that this record is done, I can finally reflect on the experience of making it. Why did I wake up in the city wearing a mask and calling myself John Evermore? Well, I had a mask long before that… you see my name is #$%&$#* *&%#$#. That’s really me. You would have to walk in my shoes to understand the grief I felt and the loss I experienced to perhaps understand what drives a man to hide away from himself. 200 North is the place where John Hadder was born. What’s become clear to me now, only after finishing this record, is that John Hadder in some way was an idea that I embodied for arts sake. Call it a possession of sorts.. but not really that dramatic. More of a willingness on my part to just obey what I feel at all costs regardless of what it looks like. I’ve done this before in my life. Changed my name for music projects. That’s all this ever was. I’ve always been great at adapting to my surroundings for arts sake. Believe me I was as confused as you.. I had no choice in the matter, the idea of Diamonds Hadder, the story of it, appeared to me vividly at that time in my life.. the year of the fire and beyond..… as I was breaking down… I think simply because it wanted to exist. I’m not really crazy but I do listen to the wind and sometimes it takes me places far away. I thought it first appeared then, just before the fire… but now I look back and see the mask showing up in my life long before that. In old band photoshoots and music videos, in old documentaries I filmed.. and in my home footage… I think I was always supposed to write this book called Diamonds Hadder. The making of this record will mark an interesting time of my life, a confusing time of prolonged healing and deep depression and grief and ultimately hope. A blurred time of reality. A time when I abandoned the real person I was for a moment because I was too lost and broken to care to remember who I was. And so I created something. Having said that, things do matter, there actually is an end to the race. For me, that day is now. I think I finally understand who John Hadder is, where he came from and who I am. I think I’m ready to just be me again on the music side of things… and also ready now to just let Hadder have his book and his story to tell how he wishes moving forward. Thanks Johnny. I’m sure we’ll see you on the road in the future. You may notice some changes to the site in the coming months as I reclaim my own spirit.

To Lord Jules, my good friend from so far away… who has created so much art for me along this incredible journey of a record. You have no idea what this image means to me, thank you so much for capturing this moment of my life. When I look at it.. my eyes drift down to that hillside… and the home that was there… and the man on that porch under the rising moons and fog surrounded by hummingbirds and love as he watched the world spiral out of control and burn away. What a place that was. Thank you sir.

So what now… well. I’ll release it all officially and continue writing. Look for a music video for this Ballad of the Dead Rabbit track coming soon, or at least before I leave for my winter pilgrimages. I’m working on the video now. The rest of the Hadder tale is still coming to me… I can’t wait to see what mess he gets himself into next. For now, enjoy the release of the first 16 stories as they get narrated on the Diamonds Hadder youtube channel each week by various characters from the story. I’ll be around building the next level of this tower. Enjoy the spring. I think I’ll go sit on that hill this week and sip a nice IPA. Forecast is for fog on Sunday. Should be pretty up there. If you’ve come this far, thank you. I can only hope something I’ve created might inspire you in some way.. to stay your own course when the road is hard… and to keep hopeful for better days.

farewell

-johnny

https://youtu.be/YRf9zFEkH1U

Video: A video narration of the 4th field note, "Red River and the Luna Moth".

Gallies and the last Winter

Image: Some artwork I did regarding the Gallies, they are a new tribe of nomads I envisioned for the Hadder tale. I mentioned them a few weeks ago, they will show up in the next 16 stories later in the year... or next year.... Details are a bit sketchy at the moment, but I think they reside up in the Hills somewhere between Europa and the sanded gateway.

Good morning, the end of march approaches. A little Hadder update today.

Music: I started mixing the final track for the record this week. Actually, blew some speakers in my car doing listening tests. Not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. Ha. The dead rabbit is sounding pretty grand. It’s bringing a lot of emotions to the surface of my life, but, I suppose that’s what art is all about. You’ll understand when you see the video. So yes, as I’m nearing the final days of tracking I’ve already started the timeline for the Dead Rabbit video. Once the timeline starts… well.. just a matter of filling in the Data. I hope to have a full band to the shoot some of the video sequences, we’ll see how that goes. I’m pretty sure you will see some of the characters from the animations, show up in the music video, singing a thing or two. That’s the plan as of late.

Narration: On the topic of “The Warmoths” and this latest video animation. These were some of the first characters that came to me for the Diamonds Hadder story. There was a day I was building a vocal booth, chopping wood and construction walls in the tower. Kinda like my potato mountain in “Close encounters of the third Kind”, if you know what I mean. When I finally capped the booth off, I opened a track and began vocalizing inside the booth… testing it out. I starting singing a song called “The Warmoths”. Personally, I had never heard the word before and not really sure why I started singing it… but that’s where it started. They became a part of the Diamonds Hadder story then, this story that I’m writing in between making music and digging myself out of the ditch I climbed in a few years back. This field note #3, was the first real mention of these creatures. I imagined Hadder sitting on a hill talking about them. Most of the story comes from his journals… his field notes for Master Zabble, mostly written during the time he was growing up at Killwaughter in the hills of BOK. I mention more about then In the next note as well, at the time I thought it was important to describe these characters early as they will have a very important role in this story. I’ve also commissioned a new piece of artwork this field note, a few weeks ago, although it’s not ready yet. Perhaps I’ll share that next week. We’ll see what Lord Jules comes up with.

Well that’s it this week. I have a lot to do still. It is spring now, although winter is really holding on to the hills of BOK this year. She can try, but the flowers they are coming… no matter what. She does this sometimes, that winter is very stubborn. I’m looking forward to some sun, and the green and yellow hills that dress my old mountain. Here’s a few passages from “The ballad of the Dead Rabbit”.

“Take this heart, take this heart I offer it to you.

But don’t you stop… don’t you stop till it all burns down.

Hail the wolf, hail the wolf who rides the wind.

Who brought you fire.. just to make you sing.

Bring your hell, oh bring your hell to me…

I’ve been waiting here on this hill I called home.

I’ve seen fire and I’ve seen rain too

It doesn’t matter no more.. I’m done running to save myself from you.

Who goes there pest of my canyon,

I come with news from the end.

Who dares pass these hills of sandstone,

shall he know the wrath of time.

Sins they fall like winter leaves

Call me the master of the weeds

Tending the gardens once a week

Shame some things we can never keep

So I tried to hold it all in

Things I could never be or say

This precious gift of life

Still buries in the end.

I play the fool, you guard the gates

We let the wind decide our fates

Jesters a wolf, who lies in wait

And he called me…. the dead rabbit

I heard the song of the blackbird,

singing in the field of blowing wind

Did no wrong did that black bird learn

Oh he fell, but didn’t burn.

he called me…. the dead rabbit."

Farewell,

-j

https://youtu.be/O8I1zU1hs1E

Video: A video narration of the 3rd field note, "The Warmoths".

The Bloom

Image: Some artwork I did of a young Hadder out in the Black Forest.

Good morning, it’s Friday again. Oh, the waves of march are pounding my coastline. It’s music to my ears. I was wandering this week and came upon a river that fed into the ocean out past ramrod, and with all this winter melt, it was flowing like I’ve never seen before. A rapid stream rushing over rounded beach rocks spilling into the crashing waves of the pacific. My cove has been rebuilt. It took quite the winter I suppose, but it did reform itself. Well, what’s new.

Artwork and narrations: Well, I’ve been riding the AI train these fateful weeks of March. I seem to have found myself in the middle of a rather interesting time in terms of art, I stumbled into it quite accidentally. I am embracing it and I think it’s rather exciting, especially considering all the work I plan to do for this Hadder project. Between MJ-5 and GPT-4 and Clipgrab and Kaiber… well, let’s just say I’m getting some help with some interesting and mundane tasks on the storytelling side of things. And then there’s the whole talking animations thing which happened rather suddenly. I knew there was a reason I was designing all these characters months ago. When your walking the path, the true path… what ever that is to you… it’s kind of natural to run into things along the way that help along the journey. I think that’s what’s happening. So, having said that, I’ve included another talking narration this week… “Lord Zabble and the Castle Fanglore”. It’s so nice to here and “See” it spoken… is this Diamonds Hadder talking? In one of the many faces he seems to wear. Hmmm… not sure, but he has a way about him for sure. His eyes are quite piercing and hypnotizing. I was at the gym last night listening and watching him talk to me and I felt like I was in a trance. I like the way this whole story is turning out. By the time I write the next 16 stories, I imagine I’ll have a few new tricks up my sleeve as this AI video revolution takes shape this summer.

Music and The Rabbit: Last track is coming along nicely. A lot is going on lately, aside from the final vocal tracking days for my dead rabbit overture… there’s also a revolution in the Mixing age happening as well, again mundane tasks are being done away with… sidechaining bass guitars to kickdrum thumps, notching strings for vocals… it’s all going away thanks to our new AI friends. For me it’s a blessing, I’ve always enjoyed the creative side of art so much more than the mundane tasks. I never wanted to be a music engineer or a photo and video editor… I just wanted to make art. I wanted to snap the picture and hold the microphone. So, these new tools will all happily find there way into my workflow so that I can accomplish more on the creative side of things. Regarding my rabbit, the end of this song was going to fade out… which these days is a strange thing, no songs fade out anymore. That’s precisely why I wanted to do it… and the song sounded like a fade out, but I accidently composed a little piece of piano for the end and a little poem vocal line to go along with it and so now… hmmm… I have a dilemma on my hands. I’m hoping to figure that out this week… the new piano part is a pretty good closer for the record and for the rabbit tale itself. We’ll see. I do intend to release a video for the Last Track and I’ve been writing a little story board for it along the way here in march, as well as designing some art and techniques I hope to use in the video. I think it should be done at the end of June, yeh, that sounds good. I think I can do that. I have a large body of work left before autumn and winter pilgrimages come a knocking on my chamber door once again. These are my spring and summer chores.

Well, that’s it for now. I’m scheduled to go see another rehearsal room downtown this week. Rehearsal rooms are such a financial kick in the gut. Bok real estate is kind of ridiculous these days and so there’s no rush on my end to open that flood gate, at least until the record is fully released with a video in the wing. I hope sometime in August to be sitting in my chambers sipping a cold celebratory IPA, as I pack for yearly pilgrimages, pondering all my talking narrations and smiling on the mountain I climbed this year. I see a big change happening in 24… in a lot of things… new walls… new space… new towers… ends and beginnings. It’s like the 7 year turn just up ahead. A few more months to go… awake in 23. It’s going to be a lovely spring, I can tell. My osteospermum are blooming wildly this year. Hope your well and doing you. There is a revolution actually knocking on the door… let it in. It’s not so bad. Just some new wallpaper for the ages. Farewell rabbits.

-j

https://youtu.be/CroHtXvvsN8

Video: My artwork is still talking, oh well, so I had him read another field note, "Lord Zabble and the Castle Fanglore". Is that Hadder himself... hmmm... he does have many looks with his face shifting cloak. I never can tell who he is really.