The whats and the whys of it all

Good morning, I suppose a little update here on the 60ish day mark or so of me completing this lovely little body of heartfelt work is in order.

I did notice we had a little stargazer radio play on the Crim station and I quickly wanted to say thanks for that. Hail the Crim'inals or so it was written.

So here in these quiet flowery moon months over Bok I sit, with Ezra, in calm contemplation. Looking out at that horizon I first gazed eyes upon in late 2018 after the fires took everything from me and I awoke by that tree that I often speak about. I’m there again looking out to that golden light dancing in the pacific mist.. the view is not much different. What a trip we take. So I’ve been listening to “Long Is the Road”, as I have a working mix that travels with me these mornings… it’s close to capping. Certainly an important song which started back with the TOR band and has now finally come close to leaving my bones for good. I’m very happy it will be on this first Hadder record.

“Time is a ladder, up to the shine, every step we take is another why, and hope is the only thing… that keeps us alive, while we reach for the gold… long is the road.”

I think these lyrics really do sum up the record for me.

Once I complete this long road, a few weeks to dance with and revisit the dead rabbit track and I do believe this body of work will near it’s end. For me, it was a long journey that will bring with it a sense of closure.. I suspect most people will not understand it at face value or even really care at all that it exists or why it exists or that it was difficult to make…. But so it the nature of art and the journey of an artist. I’m a happy puppet when I’m holding a microphone, that I know, but I’m clever enough to wonder about where the strings end. I’m happy they play me a little when they can. I suppose there is a message hidden inside this record, in the words scattered throughout… the message has to do with a question that was once asked of me during some auditions earlier in the year.

"What is Diamonds Hadder?” Ha… it’s a question that I pondered during some long winter months in the mountains of Bok, in the cold and lonely places I ventured and rested… me and the ravens and ezra. I still ponder it each night. The whats and whys of this all.

Diamonds Hadder is an idea, it’s an invisible hero… the idea is universal. Take everything you ever aspired to be, every dream you ever hoped to achieve, every kind thing you ever wished to do for all the great reasons you ever wanted to do them. Every fight that seemed unwinnable, every stand worth standing for, every memory that meant anything to you personally, every “No you can’t”, every “That’s stupid” every “it will never work” every impulse in your heart that you don’t understand but long to follow and honor at all costs… well, that’s Diamonds Hadder to me. For you it’s something else but the ide is the same. I’m well aware that it’s very particular to me and the life I lived. Born in the east during those great years. Wandering the west later in life… walking amongst the ghosts. Why I awoke near a tree, I don’t know… where I was before that… I don’t know… perhaps I should have just stayed sleeping… and maybe I just might curl up by that tree when I finish the last track. We’ll see I suppose.

Well, thanks for reading… if not now, maybe some day in the future some of these words will start to make sense for anyone who stumbles upon a song or a murmur of the thing called Diamonds Hadder from the west. I don’t know what that story will hold but I do know the full moon is coming and I have a date with the shoreline. I really wish you all the best, I hope you find your Diamonds Hadder someday... as i did.

-j

Spring Moons and Safe Places

Good morning, I suppose a little update is in order.

Life is good in the new tower, work is steady and spring is blooming. I’ve been chasing the moon a little in between finishing up the record. Singing a lot as usual. In my spare time over the years I’ve had a relationship with the moon, and it seems to have awakened again… and so I’ve been with her a lot this month. I will say it’s made me appreciate all the hard work I’ve done on the first Hadder record and it’s left me with a little aching and longing to complete it. Which is a pleasant feeling these long last days of the race.

Music: So where am I exactly. I’m engulfed in the instrument side of things at the moment, doing solos and structuring the remaining tracks to close it all out. “Long is the Road’ and “Dead Rabbit“ are both on the final days of their lives. When I put a 90 day limit on completing the record.. I knew it was a little longer than needed… but I did it purposefully so that I could spend some time with the moon this spring. I’m glad I did. It’s looking like it will all be done as planned. Aside from the Hadder record, other music things that are on my plate like the cover songs for “Rainbow in the Dark” and the 4th ramsay/evermore track called “Kind Winters” all are alive and well… but have taken a back seat to the top priority of completing the Hadder record. I’m assuming I’ll return to them in the coming months as I return to planned rehearsals. They both are about 50% completed on the vocal side of things… music on the cover songs still has a few days at Light Black studios… before they are completed as well. Doug tells me that they are planning a day soon to finish up guitar work and solos, soon I suppose. Perhaps if I finish all the hadder stuff earlier than expected, Ill complete a few of those as well inside the 90 day window and share them. Let me see what the moon does these coming cycles. A little side note.. Each day I sing to scales and patterns and piano phrases and in these vocal routines… things happen and songs are born and melodies created… words crafted and ideas made… I have so much material for the second record, it’s exciting. I can’t wait to get to it all.

The Novel: Well, no hurry here as words they last forever you know. The Diamonds Hadder tale is alive and well. I knew that it might sit a little while I focused more on the new tower move and the 1st Hadder record. I’ve been contemplating Lord Bane and the next chapter in the Diamonds Hadder tale. It’s time to introduce some new kings and queens into the story and to return to Lord Skinner and our fellows past the Gorgon bridges.. but I haven’t had the time to sit and draft the next events. I’m sure when I do dive back in, it will get interesting.

Thank you: For reading my words and for following along on this rather amazing journey. I’m just trying to be honest with myself, creating things that are dear to me for some unknown reason… I wonder sometimes if we are fools in life to think we have control over who we are and what we do… or was it all written in the stars long ago. Unavoidable and part of the fabric of time and space. Or not… maybe we can change the course of our lives… hmmm… like I said, I wonder. What a trick we live in… what a spell. Anyway… good luck to you today. Farewell. I’ll be under the moon working.

-j

"Did you find a place

That you thought was safe

from it all?

Somewhere after the light..

but only to find you were wrong

long is the road."

Video Info: A little clip from a long road. .

The land of good intentions

Image info: A design for some Hadder merch that might show up down the road.

Good afternoon, It’s Wednesday in the land of good intentions.

Record update: Yes it’s now about 75 days or so till I hope to finish this first body of work for my dear friend Mr Hadder and his bizarre symphonic request. For the last two weeks I’ve been revisiting “The Crying Game” and I do believe that that track is 99% completed now. As I suspected, work is slow trudging these foggy months and I spend a lot of time in the hills between mixes and details and African Daisey clippings. Today I return to my “Long is the Road’ track. My goal still is to finish this track up in few weeks and then whatever time I have remaining, I’ll be closing out my good old “Ballad of the Dead Rabbit” song and touching up some mixes. I think I’m on track to complete it all. Of course I have many ideas floating around my head while I work on the details of all this… Music videos for all the tracks, not traditional videos but ones that resemble my website animations. Secretly I’ve been working on such things by accident, learning the ins and outs of beat reactors and automated video FX driven my audio samples.. It’s not rocket science, as others have been using the good old beat reactor for eons already. Later down this symphony road... I can see that I’ll be faced with a dilemma when the record is done… release it myself, which means full release on all platforms, youtube videos for each song, heavy dose of monthly promo add campaigns and press releases… live shows… merch.. (which I’ve already started designing and thinking about) , or… shop it to a nice label that might do everything I could do but perhaps only better. Of course I would rather write music than be a graphic designer sales person with PR skills... but we do what we have to. I have no idea right now what I’m going to do… there is a chance that I’ll complete it and disappear in the black forest as well, a quiet escape with my pen and paper and stories to write..… you just never know. I certainly expect nothing but more work ahead of me. Other things do interest me sometimes and I do get lost in the woods frolicking with Ezra and drinking mushroom potions. I’m trying not to put to much pressure on myself, expectations can really be killers of creation. Reminding myself that I enjoy this process along the way... might seem to be a no brainer... but it is something that all artists and creators face as we all march along. A sculpture can take a while and life does happen as you chip away. To some degree you have to be an emotionless robot at times.. steering the rickety ship ahead.. without a simple spec of land on the horizon, hope can be hard to see through the fog. It isn’t all rainbows and lightning strikes, although they are out there. And so I and we all sail still.... I’m on dicey ground these spring months… clutching for old notes and wet oars. But spirits have their days and I can see an end to this first body of work. Have I mentioned that I so love to sing.

That’s all for now.

Enjoy a little 3rd video sample installment of “The Crying Game”. Beat reacted test footage to the current beach side 99% mix. I haven't decided yet if I'll be posting the final 3 tracks before the 75 day window, we'll see. Not sure it really matters, but time will tell. It always does.

-j

Video Info: A 3rd little video montage of anime that I liked to a small audio section of the "Crying Game", beat reacted. Test footage, as I'm designing some animated lyric video techniques for the record. It's a process.